Scars like Tattoos.

I am awake after a night of heavy drinking. I can feel the pounding in my left temple. My eyes are bleary. My body sore.

I move my right hand and, as my eyes focus, I catch something strange there.

I draw my hand closer to further investigate when I realize, it is scarred. That new skin discoloration. The tightness of skin resulting from a burn. But this is a strange kind of burn. Like it was etched there with great precision. There is a design here. A pattern.

I follow the interlacing lines up the back of my hand and realize, whoa. This adorns my whole right arm. It races up in a single path, leaving the intricacies for simplicity. Past the elbow, sloping up the shoulder.

My mind begins to panic as I notice these burn scars are seemingly all over me now. I trace the lines with my left finger. Feeling the raw newness. Feeling the reality. Feeling each line as I see it for the first time. 

There are designs too across my chest. One in particular catches me. It is the start of a signature. Just above my right breast. Letters of someone's name they began to etch .. but then stopped. Neglecting to even finish this particular disfigurement.

I feel betrayed. I feel ashamed. I cannot begin to fathom who would want to do this to me. Why they would want to. I am embarrassed that I imbibed so much that I cannot even remember it happening.

It is almost as if it was my fault.
I let them do this.
It was almost as if I did it myself.